YOUR MARRIAGE CAN BE GREAT!
August 17, 2003 AM
Sermon Outline
GEN 2:20-24
INTRO: God has thoughtfully given us so many good gifts. It was James who reminded us that every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights.... (Jas 1:17). Perhaps our thoughts would go to the many spiritual blessings He has showered on His children. And that sort of thinking is very appropriate. But my thoughts this morning are of another sort of gift from God. It is the gift of marriage. For some of us, however, marriage has not worked out to be a gift - we have felt pain and tragic disappointment in marriage. Still, I want to affirm and to assure that your marriage can be great.
I. BUT IT TAKES TWO TO MAKE IT SO
A. Biblical marriage involves a man and a woman: husband and wife
1. so, we are dealing with two personalities and all that entails
2. suddenly, one person living a single life must make an enormous transition to living with another person in married life
3. Eph 5:31 reminds us they two shall be one flesh
B. Thus, husband and wife must work at it to make the marriage great
1. somehow, the words of Eph 5:22 must be implemented such that the I can become the we ... or, even the you
2. each spouse must be devoted to the other - anything less is dangerous
3. such devotion subjugates everything else - jobs, hobbies, relationships, etc. - to ones spouse!
II. BUT YOU MUST COMMIT TO GODS PLAN
A. Note Mt 19:3-8 - Jesus insists that Gods people commit to Gods plan!
1. having forsaken His plan resulted in tragedy in the homes of Israel
2. Gods plan, then? one man and one woman for life!
3. such commitment implies marital fidelity without which the plan does not work as God intended
B. Ps 127:1 - But His plan includes roles, values and such
1. commitment to Christian values and understanding roles of husband and wife are so important to a great marriage
2. scripture frequently addresses these issues - learn to listen to it
3. and both spouses must commit to His plan
III. BUT YOU MUST LEARN TO FORGIVE AND COVER
A. In marriage there are so many opportunities for hurt, disappointment, etc.
1. how we deal with those things will have much to do with quality of marriage
2. Im afraid that too many keep their list of hurts caused by the other
3. is that the way people who love each other and who are Christian people behave?
B. Col 3:13 - Note the forbearing ... more forbearing, less forgiving!!!
1. 1 Pet 4:8 - I always have the choice of forbearing, covering, overlooking
2. one of the human problems with this has to do with our not feeling vindicated until someone has asked forgiveness ... so things just simmer and seethe
3. Prov 19:11 - this absolutely must be practiced to have a great marriage
IV. BUT YOU MUST LEARN TO COMMUNICATE
A. Note that communicate has a relationship to commune
1. commune speaks of a depth of relationship ... note 1 Cor 10:16
2. essential to communing is togetherness, fellowship ... and inherent in this togetherness is communication
3. human beings are blessed with the faculty of speech and depth of communicating
B. Communicating requires interest, time, effort, listening ...
1. over the years, I have kept coming back to Eph 4:29
2. especially in marriage must communicating minister grace unto the hearer
3. husband and wife must be engaged in the communion of communication - and I would suggest that both read Biblical passages and good secular materials which assist with beneficial, wholesome communicating
V. BUT YOU MUST KEEP NEGLECT FROM YOUR RELATIONSHIP
A. Neglect grows from carelessness
1. I would guess that neglect is rarely intentional
2. we become so busy, so fragmented, so weary that we just let the important things slip a bit ... and, little by little, neglect sets in
3. many a good marriage has found its way into deep trouble because of the neglect of one spouse toward the other
B. Do not begin to take each other for granted!
1. do you pray for your spouse every day?
2. do you often do some small, significant thing for your spouse?
3. do you take time for each other ... real, committed time?
CLOSE: I continue to believe that any marriage, no matter the number of anniversaries, can be great ... but, as I said at the very beginning, it takes two to make it so.
Cecil A. Hutson
17 August 2003